Betise
by lye tea
Summary: Agreeing is very hard work. /Zuko & Toph' Drabbles/
1. Rejoinder

**Rejoinder**

I.

The road to nowhere is icy and slippery, one step forward and two steps back.

Toph placed her foot on the ground, firm and resilient and just a bit scared (that one twice as much). She looked back over her shoulder and wished she hadn't turned.

Huddled behind, in the shadow, in the cold and dark and forlorn, he couldn't get his lungs to work.

II.

"Here, take this." She handed him a blanket, tattered and frayed at the edges, the threads coming apart. Covered in holes, it was a rag and he knew it.

"No."

"Why are you so stupid and stubborn all the time?"

(I don't know) he wanted to say, but that was impossible all because of something called pride.

Called foolish too, because that's what pride was when stripped away, had chipped off the paint—sluiced and dipped in acid. Just in case.

III.

Sometimes, she doesn't know why she even bothered. Bothered to be his friend, to comfort him, just be _there_. Toph wasn't nice. She wasn't some berry-rouge fairy come to make bad-things go away.

_Still._

She listened and played out the little sister for him, the one for soothing and joy and endless childish despairs churned up in hope. (But she liked it too, the feeling of being free and savage. Legs and feet kicked way up in the air.)

And she never asked why.

It just _was_.


	2. Thought for Food

**Thought for Food**

I.

Lying is a tricky thing, so is surrendering. So is lying about surrendering, and that was the worst of them all.

Zuko sat down next to his uncle, felt his muscles go limp and burning—like he was already diseased, had lived a life too much, had know suffering before it was due.

"At least I have my honor back," Zuko said.

And never once did Iroh look at him, enshrouded in the dark of the iron and rust, Iroh journeys home defeated and weak.

Like a sunset sent in crimson, Zuko's eyes are turning bloody and hands bloodier.

II.

Toph had a premonition the world will end up in flames. (_Not_ baptism, but fire.) And she knew the culprits all too well, and there was not a thing she did about that—

Because (after all) she was a little kid.

So, when Zuko leaned in and asked her to trust him right there and then, beneath dusk and dread, she almost, nearly slipped away. That was too much to bear.

III.

The warrior will go home (eventually). His neck will be sore and stiff, and for some reason, there will be no feeling left.

Heart carved out and cleaved, sliced, threw into stew. And as they eat, his friends and him, their last meal before the battlefield, there will be a sinking unnerve, unrest that somehow, he's eating himself.

Immolation, the sacrifice made whole again.

IV.

Acceptance and rejection are two powerful concepts. But one has spite, and the other bite.

Toph examined her feet, peeled away the emerging blisters. She picked at the skin, raw and pink and rendered her blind. She thought of anger and revenge, but decided that wasn't her. Not in this.

But it still hurt, that was obvious.

And if she had been the type of girl to cry, she just might have. But Toph wasn't, and so, she left it at that.

The sun's going down, going down cold.


	3. Example Learned

**Example Learned**

Zuko's birth came along unexpected and painful for Ursa. She drew on short, harsh breathes and swore that each would be her last. But she lived, and so did he, so did the little infant she held.

"What would you like to do with him?" her maid asked.

Ursa sighed in contempt and hate, "Toss it in the river."

In the river like a rotten fish, after a day's catch, it goes back. Dead.

Born in the middle of the night, Zuko always knew what the dim was like, soughed. There was no sunrise of him, just the perpetual dark. And like all clichés go, he grew up bursting from a flamed wheel.

**-x-**

…_inception is like conception…_

_there is regret_

_or there is joy_

_never both_

**-x-**

"Aren't you scared?" Toph asked.

And Zuko frowned, the furrows grooved deep in his forehead—price of royalty, the price to rule. "No, why would I be? I'm not the one in there…the one…you know."

"What if something goes wrong? Something horribly wrong? And she dies. And…and…"

"You know, you're really encouraging, a natural. I feel infinitely better after that," he snapped back.

"I'm just saying."

"I know."

Because it was almost dawn, just like he was told and remembered. _Like a rotten fish_. Fetid and reviled.

But Toph knew that one too.


	4. Chimerically Yours

**Chimerically Yours**

The frost outside was jagged and sharp, a million crystals reflected in one.

With her hair in tiny knots and arms bound in sinew and twists (of the imaginary kind, of the forever kind), Toph vanquishes dragons and monsters—one at a time. Like in a dream in which you don't wake up, she wanders from here to there, and back to nowhere.

**-x-**

Caught in the cave and river spanning between worlds, Zuko held her hand in his. His palm, wet and warm and nervous, was all tangled from fear.

"Wake up," he said. Wake up like nothing was gone, nothing amiss and awry.

**-x-**

"Where am I?"

Koh shuffled along the dampened floors, scattered with ancient leaves desiccated and rot. Koh walked in books and pages and the knowledge left unrevealed. "The Spirit World," he answered. Simple. She was so young and stupid.

"Then. Am I dead?"

"Of course. How else could you have gotten here?"

**-x-**

"It's a pity. That girl must've been the only friend you ever had."

And Zuko was all-of-a-sudden jolted awake, shaken and stirred. Galvanized, like metal just before molding.

"When you see her, tell her our Pai Sho game's no finished yet."

And Zuko kicked fire into the air, breathed in oxygen and life, and wiped away Azula's smile too.


	5. Faineance

**Faineance**

"He was an idiot, you know," Azula once said.

"I know," And Toph twice answered.

"Then why did you try to save him? People like _that_," she pointed to the tile about to be consumed, "should be avoided. Trust me, it's better that you died."

Toph laughed at this. On some things, Azula was amusing (and right). "I guess our choices in friends are different."

"I can see _that_. But that is true. Mine is superior. Take if from me again, you shouldn't be missing him. He'll be here soon. Koh needs another face for his collection, and I'm afraid I'm just not pretty enough."

"Oh, really?"

And Azula's eyes grew wide and afraid, Toph had taken her tile and won. And vengeance was avenged, and she's met her match. And supposedly, she'd just lost too if Azula allowed herself to believe that.

The trees rustled and a breeze fluttered by (carried on butterfly wings). They would have felt it too, if that was allowed in this world.

"Why, you're a natural," Azula exclaimed, mocking and dripping with honeyed venom. Tongue laced, dipped in sugar-powder.

"Learned from the best."

"Who, my brother? Impossible."

"No, you're uncle."

"Ah, of course. I should've known. Uncle had an abnormal fondness for Pai Sho."

"Well, he _was_ really good."

"Yes, but enough of _him_. My dear brother should be arriving any minute now. He's just been killed, didn't you notice?"

Now, it was Toph's turn to become astonished and scared. And out came a little gasp, felt like a typhoon and pent-up too-long rage.


	6. Gut

**warning: **malicious sarcasm and mocking**  
**

* * *

**Gut**

When everything was over, there would be courage.

And the foolish pride that kept it alive and rancid.

Of enduring things, now, that was a lie.

**-x-**

Toph jumped and landed and called the earth awake. Called up mountains and raised up plains. She bent the dirt and coaxed the iron and along drifted a storm.

See, she can cut—

And he can slither.

And together, they made up the rat and the snake. Just one and the same, with reciprocal coats and fangs.

"Can't catch me!" she yelled to behind her shoulder.

So, she tripped and crashed and burned. But that took bravery and myopia, both of which she had plenty.

So, he laughed at her, thinking that he's invulnerable, impossible to haul down from his pedestal. And a second later, he's on the ground—arm scrapped and bloody too.

**-x-**

At the end of a war, there are no victors. Only those who have lost the most and those who have lost the least.

The ones who died for their nation, country, dignity and honor with vehemence and no choleric afterwards, those are the ones who slit their throats with butcher knives.

But the ones who fled and cowered in fear and righteously agreed the entire thing was a spectacle to be sneered, those lived and made their mangled bodies home.

And over the verge of the finale, the Avatar and them (the ones unmentioned, the ones forgotten and _unworthy_) are the losers who won who lost in the end.


	7. Crossroads

**a/n: **satire

* * *

**Crossroads**

…_at the place where it ends…_

It is, it was,

Never dies,

Always fades.

**-x-**

Past miles of veins running and blood churning, there is a place

—Where in tangled hairs and netting, nothing happens.

Two come, and one leave.

**-x-**

"And now, you are married," Iroh says, Iroh notes.

Strange.

That_that_ girl and _that_ boy (of all the millions in the world) wind up married. To Each Other. Together Forever.

And they think that it will last. And they think they are impervious to the battles and the rain and the fire. And they think that love is enough. It is enough to go by and will not vanish in a second, without warning.

And so, "You are now married."

**-x-**

What Iroh doesn't know (what no one knows) is the afterwards. The thing beyond the happily ever after. That sometimes, a lifetime (or two) can extend beyond words and gestures and fake-sweet embraces.

The thunder comes, and no one hears. And all they can feel is the pounding fear

—Resonates and buries, a hundredfold.

**-x-**

Toph, Zuko decides, was a terrible mother. Her flesh in stone and heart like earth. Toph, Zuko decides, is no mother to anyone (and in need of one herself).

"What are you doing?"

"I'm teaching her to Earthbend!" Toph declares, loud and proud, and waves their child high in the air.

"She's two!"

"You can never start too early."

_But you can_, he thinks, _like a lifetime gone to waste._

**-x-**

At twenty, Toph thought about her and herself. And how this really isn't working out.

And so, one morning, she left—that is the end of that. A disaster gone.

"Now, you are no longer married," Iroh jokes and bounces his grand-niece on his ancient, creaking knees.

"Shut up, Uncle," Zuko said.

And Iroh laughs to himself.

Funny thing: Forever was so short.


	8. Celadon Gone Cold

**Celadon Gone Cold**

"You hate everything."

"I don't hate you."

"I know."

And Zuko and Mai leaned toward each other and kissed. Right there, right then, beneath scarlet and sun, under dusk and glow—Zuko woke up screaming.

**-x-**

"Is something wrong?" Toph asked.

Zuko turned, hoping that it was her and not _her_. "Just a nightmare."

And red and gold, and everything he had left behind.

**-x-**

…_like fire, like hot…_

_but blue was sweet_

_blue was true_

_and blue didn't meet_

_half-way and part_

**-x-**

"You know, Sparky, this is really good booze."

"That's…that's not…booze."

"Oh." 

**-x-**

One day, a messenger came riding ferociously from the south. His face veiled and coated in sweat, and he said, "A message for the Fire Lord."

And Zuko accepted it, took the parchment without hesitation and burned it up in his hand.

And everyone looked at him scared and curious.

**-x-**

One day later, Mai appeared.

Dressed in black and solemn, she stepped inside the courtyard with dignity and restraint. And along with her came Tom-Tom, swollen with happiness and child-free naiveté.

"So, you actually survived the hit," Mai said.

And now, it was time for Zuko to look scared and curious.

**-x-**

"Sparky, that's not booze."

"It's tea, here, have some."

Zuko poured the hot liquid into another cup, porcelain and cold—almost like a heart peeled. The steam rose and wafted and blended with the air, and the aroma thickened into a nasty, vile paste.

"In times like this, it's good to have friends."

Toph stared at him, wondering if he finally broke into insanity, head-long, just like the rest of them. "Times like what?"

"Like this, when you're desperate and alone."

**-x-**

One day after that day after _that_ day, another woman arrived.

Two in fact.

One riding the skies on her hands with a laugh that could erupt mountains with charm. And the other like a viper come to settle scores.


	9. Integument

**Integument**

…_skin cut, skin meet…_

Toph has a skin twice deep. Skin twice as hard and impenetrable, like rock or crystal.

But on the inside, there is nothing. Toph scorns honor and the likes, says they are just petty (pretty) words for fools to believe, for kings to relish when their kingdoms are lost.

And so, when Zuko talks about his lost honor and how horrid it is to be banished, she scoffs and openly laughs at him.

"Why are you miserable? You never had any dignity in the first place, so you couldn't possibly be more worthless than you were before."

And no one really understood why (that) she is right till too late, till they realize the skin covering their squirming flesh is soon to be shed.

**-x-**

"You should rest, Prince Zuko," Uncle Iroh once said.

"Why?" the Prince replied, "I have nothing left. My own father exiled me! Me! His own son!"

"But you should rest. You still have your health."

"Yeah, what good is living if you're a nobody?"

**-x-**

Respect comes like a pendulum. Swings from here to there and nearly touching but never does. Toph commands respect, or so she liked to think. She makes herself large and strong and bracing against the world.

And when she topples over from the hard-long accumulated admiration, she breaks into a million—and one.

The one flies away and lands elsewhere, where it finds a new home and a new victim.

**-x-**

"Ow!" Zuko cried loud and shrill (like a girl gone lost her shoe).

"What is it, my nephew?"

"Something just went into my eye."

"Probably nothing, just some dust."

And from that moment on, Prince Zuko never regained his sight.

And that is the story of great tragedy (and humor too).


	10. Disdain

**Disdain**

When Aang danced with Onji, Toph laughed at their awkward movements. And then when Aang danced with Katara, Toph nearly fell over from cackling. Maladroit and ridiculous, those two complemented each other beautifully.

Like two left feet shackled and bound and left to spin on a pivot.

**-x-**

"Would you like to dance?" Zuko said—teased.

"Sparky," she said, "I'm _blind_."

"Don't make excuses, I know you can dance perfectly well."

"You're right, I just don't want to dance with you. Might get some princely germs on me. You know, the ones that never wash off."

**-x-**

When Aang and Katara married, Toph really did fall over. Broke her throat, broke her lungs, broke all the laughter in the world.

He stood one head shorter and a mile more callow.

And Katara, like the epitome of the Mother.

**-x-**

"What an awful pair they make," Toph sang for all to hear. For all to see how absurd this was.

But only Zuko heard and only he had sense to agree. "Yeah, kinda like a fish and a bird."

"Exactly that."

(And only Zuko had the ability to make a pun as boring as that.)

**-x-**

Toph had a harsh-wielding desperation frenetically going crazy. But that was a secret, and she was never going to tell.

But Zuko was a good friend and had a good ear too.

"Sparky, I have something to say. I'm not jealous of Katara, and I don't like Aang. In fact, I don't even like boys. I liked your sister."

"Okay," Zuko shrugged. After all, that had been _obvious_.


	11. Gelid

**Gelid**

Forgiveness came in short.

Each one dealt with a last—hidden—knife, just waiting to twist in.

But a ghost knife, whispery and beautiful (and ugly—sometimes). A knife that hurt brutally. Froze over skin, glide over heart and soul and wrenched out all the magic in droplets.

Or the nonexistent mind, left to wander.

Forever.

**-x-**

"The Sugar Queen is also a Drama Queen, so you'll have to excuse her."

Still, Zuko didn't really take Toph's words to heart. But he remembered the skin stretched on Katara's knuckles, the skin flattened out white and milky across the bones, skin like ice and pain.

"Is she always this tense?"

"Pretty much."

**-x-**

Katara sat by herself most of the time now. Sat alone and pondered, thinking. Pretending to know what will come ahead, see the shadows foreshadow and lie—

Lie to herself that she's got everything all set up. In a matter of months (_weeks_) they'll be free. Manumission before fermentation in a forsaken place like this.

Like a cemetery, where all the monks came to die.

**-x-**

Summer was coming, coming fast.

And in honor of the (dreadful, _dreaded_) season, Katara made a feast.

"Zuko," she began, "I apologize for the things I've said to you before."

And finished, "If they can trust you, then so can I."

And what would have been so sanguine (cloying-horrid) was not when Toph came in (saw through her clenched teeth and deceits). And Katara dropped her hands in distress.

**-x-**

So all the wounds closed, so all the wounds healed.

So new ones can emerge, so new ones can become the new ideal.


End file.
